What do you want?
In my years of personal development coaching in Hamilton, I have seen that though each person has a unique situation, there are also some common coaching themes.
Do you want to ……
The way we relate to and communicate with others has an enormous impact on our happiness and this makes relationships a frequent subject during coaching sessions.
Do you want to…
- Begin a new relationship, but are unconfident or scared?
- Reignite the intimacy and connection within an existing relationship?
- Forgive yourself or others?
- Develop the skills and confidence to make friends?
Get in touch to improve the way you relate with people, and create more satisfying, meaningful connections with others.
“I am more positive open and have a lot more tolerance and appreciation towards people who are different from me. I am also enjoying a wonderful caring relationship with a very considerate and respectful man. This is a huge breakthrough for me, because I was not used to being treated so nicely.”
“My increasing self-acceptance was mirrored in my attitudes to others, and my relationships improved as I allowed other people to be who they are.”
“Learning to think more kindly of myself has also helped me think more kindly of others, so I am now more patient and tolerant of other people.” Shaun
“I have stopped being so self conscious and focused in on myself, and become more approachable and able to connect with others.”
A person can have everything the world regards as important, but sometimes even in the midst of “everything” feel that something is missing.
- Do you know who you really are, or what really matters to you?
- Have you worked so hard to get everything you thought you wanted, that somewhere along the way lost yourself?
- Are you so busy doing what everyone else says you should, that you don’t even know what you want anymore?
- Have you forgotten your dream and settled for what is “realistic”?
Your relationship with yourself is at the heart of a meaningful and happy life. Coaching will give you a safe, encouraging curious place to listen to and trust yourself. When you get in touch with your inner wisdom needs and desires your life will take on a deeper meaning and purpose.
Get in touch to discover who you are and what you really want and create a life that reflects your values and deepest desires.
“Before coaching I felt I should be happier than I was, but could not put my finger on what were the issues and why I was unhappy.”
“I had a sense that something was missing from my life, and discovered I focused too much on work.”
IS THERE A LESS STRESSED “YOU” LOST IN AN OVERSCHEDULED LIFE?
- Feel frustrated or resentful by the demands on your time?
- Long to slow down and enjoy your loved ones and life again?
- Find it hard to relax, because you feel there is always something else you should be doing?
- Lie awake at night worrying how you will get everything done the next day?
- Think a fancier planning system will solve your problems?
- Spend a good chunk of income on time saving services?
Gandhi once said, “There’s more to life than increasing its speed.”
My experience with clients is that it is often not better time management that is required, but better self-management. Often it is as simple as realising that saying no to others, means saying
YES TO YOU!
In the safety of coaching we can also explore the reasons that may be driving you to keep doing more than you really want.
What truths or issues would you need to face if you weren’t so busy?
Get in touch to reclaim the peace, time, simplicity and serenity you have lost and create a life that you can enjoy rather than endure.
“I have created a better work life balance and am celebrating and enjoying all the extra time and fun I have made for me.”
“Much of my stress has disappeared, because I am more comfortable asking for help, and also because I make better choices on how much I take on.”
“I now feel more in control of my work life balance, and am disciplined about starting and finishing work at a reasonable time.”
Drawing on my experience tutoring positive parenting course and the principles of non-violent communication (NVC)
I can help you to…
- Gain confidence interacting in social situations.
- Learn how to listen so others open up and talk to you.
- Learn how to talk so others listen and respect you.
- Express yourself assertively and respectfully.
- Rehearse sensitive conversations before you have them.
- Move beyond power struggles to gain co-operation with your children.
- Be more assertive and set boundaries with others.
Get in touch and learn to express yourself in a confident, assertive, respectful and effective way.
“I am now a lot more assertive at setting boundaries, and this has significantly changed my personal and professional relationships.”
“I am more in touch with my feelings, and this increased self-awareness has made me more open and real in the way I communicate with others.”
“I am more relaxed, confident, approachable and assertive at work, which has created a healthier happier co-operative work environment for myself, boss and other staff.”
“I now communicate in a powerful, honest non-reactive way, and arguments are diffused quickly.”
“Coaching has helped my social confidence and meeting new people no longer worries me.”
For the first 30 years of my life I gave myself a hard time in the hope that it would motivate me to change. I now see that making myself feel worse in the hope that it would help me do better was a very flawed logic.
Do you also believe this?
Do you collect evidence of all the many ways you are flawed and falling short, while completely taking for granted your many skills and lovely qualities?
Would you like to……
- Replace harsh self-criticism, with kindly encouragement?
- Focus on your strengths not flaws?
- Let go of perfectionism, and get comfortable with making mistakes?
- Like and accept yourself just as you are?
I help you find that sweet spot between self-acceptance versus self-improvement and replace your self-criticism, shame and loathing with accepting yourself, as you are, where you are. When you are no longer at war with yourself, it gives you the clarity and energy to make changes in a kind and sustainable way.
If you are tired of berating and criticising yourself, and being so much less than you know you can be then get in touch.
“I have got better at focusing on my successes, and am more realistic and kind to myself”.
I was very critical of myself and would ruminate for days over any embarrassing mistakes I made. Now when I make a mistake I can laugh about it and try again."
“I discovered my own strengths, which has increased my self-acceptance, and raised my self worth and confidence.”
“Her kind encouraging words, and positive opinion of me, helped me see I was actually a nice person.”
Many of my clients who struggle with procrastination, tend to have very little down time, so they sneak it in by procrastinating with that extra cup of coffee, browsing the Internet etc. With coaching I encourage you to prioritise your perfectly valid needs for pleasure and fun, so that you actually have more energy and focus to give to your other responsibilities.
Other clients procrastinate to rebel against their inner bully, who is ordering them about. Clients like this often talk about what they “should, ought, have to” do. I help you change this resentful mindset and get creative on how you to make tasks enjoyable and easy.
Some clients procrastinate because they are afraid of failing or getting hurt. Instead of avoiding uncertainty, pain and fear by procrastinating you can learn to relate to your discomfort, so that it no longer stops you from trying.
In coaching you will get tools to manage your feelings of disappointment, fear and hurt. When you know you can handle whatever happens, you have the confidence to do the scary stuff.
In coaching we will also build your courage muscles by gently extending your comfort zone in manageable steps. We all have a comfort zone, a stretch zone and a panic zone. In coaching I help you to explore your stretch zone in a gentle and caring matter, without reaching the panic zone so that you will expand the area that feels safe and comfortable.
Get in touch if you are sick of going around in circles and sabotaging your best intentions, and want to achieve what matters to you.
“I no longer put things of, or dwell on negative things, and am achieving more in my day”.
“Because Annemarie kept me on track, I am more focused and disciplined on making the changes that will help me reach my goals.”
“Annemarie’s encouragement helped me to overcome my fears and procrastination.”
Do you think selfish is a dirty word?
Do you struggle to put yourself at the top of the list?
Would you like to...
- Prioritise activities that are nourishing & meaningful to you?
- Say no, or disappoint others without guilt?
- Replace your “should’s, have to’s and must’s” with “want to’s”?
- Create some “me time” without your children or responsibilities?
- Make choices from love instead of guilt and obligation?
In coaching I will encourage you to listen to and meet your needs, without guilt. I’ve come to understand that selfishness leads to selflessness. The more you are able to meet your own needs, the more you will be available for others. When we care deeply for ourselves, we have more energy and joy. When we have more energy and joy we naturally begin to care for others, our families, our friends, in a healthier and more effective way.
Get in touch if you are tired of revolving your life around the needs and expectations of others, and want to focus on your own happiness.
“Annemarie encouraged me to be true to myself, and discover what made me joyful and prioritise those things into my life.”
“Coaching helped me examine the excuses and barriers I had to not following my passion. I have learnt to take my passion seriously and treat myself like a professional.”
“Annemarie helped me rejuvenate my passion for singing, and I now singing weekly with a tutor, and am excited to be following my dream.”
“Annemarie gave me permission to be kind and gentle to myself, and encouraged me to create more balance by filing my life with more nurturing activities.”
In coaching the most common obstacle people have in making changes is their critical inner voice. This unfriendly voice tells us such things as….
"I can't do it; I don't deserve it anyway; it'll never work; I'm not good enough; and no-one wants me..."
- Have unfriendly critical voices in your own head, which limit you in achieving your deepest wishes?
- Want to know how to stop fears running your life?
- Want to know how to turn your inaccurate, unhelpful and negative beliefs into something useful, and empowering?
Most people think that if they could only get rid of this voice they would be free to make changes. My experience is that the problem is not so much having the voice (which by the way we all do) the real problem is that you BELIEVE the voice. You think it is telling you the truth, that it is only protecting you from making a fool of yourself.
As someone who has personally struggled with these things I understand how painful this is.
In coaching I use a variety of well-recognised techniques to help you defuse, exchange and minimise the power negative thoughts have on you. I will help you disengage with the Voice and get access to your true self, which is clear, wise, compassionate and curious.
Get in touch and learn how to defuse this nasty inner voice, so it no longer sabotage your dreams or limits you in achieving your deepest wishes.
“If I feel down or have challenges I now able to put myself in a lot better place more easily.”
“Now I take disappointments and frustrations in my stride, and am able to go with the flow and get into solution mode.”
Fear and lack of confidence have been replaced with trust and self belief”
- Just going through the motion or skimming the surface of your life?
- Too stressed and busy to ever properly relax or fully engage with your loved ones?
- Lost in thought, especially regrets about the past or worrying about the future?
- Only living in your head with no awareness from the neck down?
PERHAPS WHAT IS MISSING IS YOUR ABILITY TO STOP AND CONNECT FULLY WITH THE PRESENT MOMENT.
Imagine what would your life be like if you…..
- Felt more connected with life, and your loved ones?
- Were able to pay more attention to your present moment?
- Stopped doing more and learnt how to “BE” more?.
Life is far to precious to let it slide by, so Get in touch to discover how practicing mindfulness will help you enjoy and connect with life again.
“Coaching helped me to accept what had happened in the past, and to stop dwelling on it and move forward.” Melissa
“I have made peace with what happened, and as a result I am able to live more in the now. I am happier and more relaxed and can now enjoy my family, because I am able to be in the moment.”
People often come to coaching when they are at a crossroads in their life.
Do you want to…
- Have the clarity and confidence to make the right choice?
- Transition positively through a divorce, separation or bereavement?
- Clarify whether to work on or walk away from a relationship?
- Regain your confidence and trust after a traumatic experience?
- Move on from shame, guilt and regrets over past mistakes?
- Embrace rather than fear a change?
- Find a new purpose and meaning after retirement?
- Learn from setbacks and become better, not bitter?
- Make a major life change that's exciting and scary at the same time?
Get in touch if you need to make a big decision about your future, or are in a period of transition and want to move forward in a positive way.
“Coaching has been an important part of helping me move on from a traumatic experience. I was able to process what happened, and define what actions would help me heal and move forward.”
“Letting go of past hurts has freed up the energy and motivation to reconnect with my values and goals. “ Sarsha
“I felt like I was at a crossroads and wanted some guidance about which way to turn. I now value my own talents and feel certain about where I want to put my energy. I am on the right path, and am committed to working on my passion.”
Coaching has a lot of similarities to navigating a journey
Do you know where you are now?
- Are you so busy, frantic and stressed that you haven’t been able to find the time or space to actually take stock of your life?
- Do you want to discover what is and isn’t working in your life?
Do you know where you want to go?
- Do you have a niggling sense that behind your flatness or directionless is a passion or dream that wants to be lived?
- Have you lost a loved one or your job and are wondering where to from here?
- Would you like to explore possibilities and gain clarity about your future direction?
Do you know how to get there?
- Are life circumstances or lack of confidence and motivation sabotaging your efforts to change?
- Does the gap between where you are now and where you want to go, seem overwhelming or full of obstacles?
- Do you need help breaking it down to manageable steps?
Whatever your situation life coaching provides you with a destination, a flight plan and encouraging feedback to keep you on track.
Get in touch and get the support, encouragement, accountability and bigger perspective that I can provide.
“When I came to coaching I had no direction and wasn’t sticking to the goals I did have. “Letting go of past hurts has freed up the energy and motivation to reconnect with my values and goals. “
“I feel confident and optimistic about the future. I am embarking on a new career and fulfilling some of my life ambitions.”
“I created a clear vision of what I wanted and I now know where I am going and what I want to achieve”
Whatever your unique situation and reason for coming to coaching, the bottom line is you want something to change. Change is always challenging, it can be less challenging with the support of a life coach.
If you want help to design and create a personal version of what a meaningful, and happy life is please get in touch
“Before I came to coaching I felt all over the place with no direction. I knew I wanted to be happier and more positive, and that something needed to change but had no idea how to start or what to do.”
“I was uncertain of where I was going in my life, what my passion was, let alone how I should follow it.”